They Live....apparently
Don’t worry, all will be revealed regarding the blog title. I can assure you I’ve not done a David Icke and started wearing a turquoise shellsuit. I’m of completely sound mind.
I’ve just found my calming nirvana is all.
After years languishing on social network sites, trying to find that little escape on the internet where the voices tell you “Hey, it’s alright. You’re not going batshit bonkers. You’re just a little stressed. Here, take the weight off your feet and relax.”
If ever you get the feeling life in general is getting on top of you, that workload is mounting with each passing day, there’s bills you need to pay, there’s social commitments you need to attend (that you really don’t want to) and that you feel all is lost, I recommend this:
Go on any fortean/conspiracy theory website on the web. All forum topics are titled the same way this blog is.
You’ll soon be bathed in a glow from the monitor that you’ve never quite felt before. A glow that seems to say,
“Hey mate, things aren’t so bad. Check out the shit these people believe.”
Now don’t get me wrong, I have an interest in some of the stuff that goes down on there, otherwise I wouldn’t be there, but the vast majority (I’d say 99.99999999% to be exact) is complete and utter fear mongering science fiction clap trap.
Take the horrific incidents in Japan for example. Rather than put it down to the fact that Japan is on the border of the ring of fire and earthquakes are a natural everyday occurence for them, and that given on average the big earthquakes hit once every 80 years (the last being 1923, so it was impending to say the least) the conspiracy theorists of certain websites (I won’t name them, just aim for the most popular on the net) have other ideas.
So far this week I’ve read:
- A weather control device controlled by America to put the final nail in Japan’s financial coffin (oh and of course revenge for Pearl Harbor).
- 2012 prophecy coming to fruition (yawn)
- Hidden messages in Family Guy and Illuminati Top Trumps hinting years in advance this would all happen.
- The radiation leak is intentional to somehow cull a large percentage of the world’s population as per the Georgia guidestones recommendation of keeping it at 500 million.
- This one however takes the absolute cake. DOLPHINS and WHALES have discovered alien technology at the bottom of the ocean and are using it to take revenge on Japan for all the hunting/fishing they’ve done down the years.
Y’see what I mean? How can you not feel relaxed reading that? Absolutely insane ideas that would even have Fox Mulder spluttering his tea over his keyboard at.
The only worry I have is for the human race because there is clearly a hefty percentage that either dream these things up and take them as fact, or read them and take them as fact. I’m inclined to think though they’re comfortably tucked away on ranches and compounds up in the hills awaiting impending doom.
It makes for not only an entertaining read, but a sobering one. With all the everyday grumps and groans life throws at us all, there are people out there who add to it by buying into the stuff of science fiction to make themselves miserable. If the New World Order/Illuminati does exist, they won’t have to do much by way of announcing themselves or usurping control of the populous. This lot have prepared themselves implicitly for the impending doom and will grumble their way into those FEMA camps hissing ‘I told you so’ but doing little else other than comply – because Davie Icke told them it would happen.
Or Alex Jones. Alex Jones is like a series of Lost. Claims to have the answers, but fails to deliver and just asks more questions instead.
I can’t actually believe I’m writing a blog about it all but the nonsense makes for entertaining reading. It beats browsing The Daily Mail to see what fearmongering about foxes or immigrants they’re trying to peddle, or trying to spot huge ‘journalistic’ errors in a copy of The Metro. No, the real entertainment is to be had in this subculture of alternative news that isn’t really news at all.
It’s genius because for the most part it is so horrifically flawed. Like The Da Vinci Code. The ‘theorists’ jump on one slither of an idea and generate a whole backstory, completely forgetting that science and general common sense can explain away alot of it.
And I’m not talking about marsh gas accounting for lights in the sky.
I can’t even get angry at the people who post it on the net either. It’s just a case of thinking,
“Seriously? You actually buy this. The sky must be an awesome colour in your world my friend.”
The lizard men aren’t coming to get me. The Men In Black are safely confined to Will Smith films. 2012 is nothing but a year.
Enjoy life eh? Let’s not make it worse by thinking up unseen horrors that will never impact on our lives.
Read The Secret. At least that’s an innocent crock of shit. Oh and don’t listen to Rihanna. Her masonic links are terrifying….
